Pickles, my cat is a pain in my ass!  It’s not just because I am a dog person, well maybe that is a little bit of it.  But dammit she’s a year and a half old.  When is she going to get in the cute, purry, rubbing up against you, and sitting in your lap phase?  Because that little bastard is still in the don’t try to pet me or I’ll attack you, walk by me and I’ll attack you, and even though you feed me extremely well I will try to steal the food off the stove phase.

We can’t let her in the bedroom at night because she’ll attack your feet if you move them.  And I am not the person you want to wake up to some stupid crap like that.  But then the pain in my ass will sometimes do the most horrendous howl outside our door in the middle of the night.  Or the worst of all offenses is when you are walking and she will jolt in front of you and just lay.  Doesn’t matter if its the middle of the floor or step or in the path of a closing door.  She’ll just run as fast as she can then plop down right in your way and not budge.  As if staying, “I dare you bitch, step on me or shut the door on me.”

Well dammit Pickles don’t dare me much more because you’ll get a size 7 1/2 shoved so far up your damn ass.  Or I’ll turn your little ass into two halves a cat with the next door.  I love that I wrote to my cat.  Hope she knows how to type, I’d love a comment back.